Growing up, many of my summer vacations revolved around my father qualifying for his company’s national conference. By meeting certain production requirements, we would get to travel to a big city and then hop in a minivan to explore whatever part of the country we were in at the time. Thanks to AAA and their TripTik, my dad charted some epic road trips for the family.
To give you an idea of what these trips were like, we once drove the entire California coastline starting from San Diego. We saw things like Big Sur, the redwoods in Yosemite, Hearst Castle, Los Angles and even what it was like to be behind bars at Alcatraz in San Francisco. I am not going to call it the trip highlight, but I distinctly recall throwing up some shady Mexican food on my brother’s shoes somewhere along Highway 1 near Santa Barbara. Sorry, Dave.
Fast forward 20 years.
Now, my summer family “vacation” is the string of days when my toddler’s daycare is closed. I like to travel, but I am not the type to go long distances with their little one, thus ruling out any West Coast adventures for the time being. I have nothing against those who choose travel with their little kids. I actually commend them for it. For me, however, it’s just not worth the tumult or money to bring a two-and-a-half year old to an amazing place that they will likely never remember.
So last week, in the spirit of keeping it, we hopped in the car and drove a couple of hours south on the Garden State to my in-laws at the Jersey Shore. It was an easy decision to make. Hazel loves the beach, eating doughnuts from Junior’s, Lucy the Elephant and playing with her cousins and grandparents. In fact, Hazel was so excited to get to get down there that she threw up on me the second she made it out of the car! The irony is not lost on me and I can’t wait to tell my brother.
While vacationing close to home may have been what worked best for us, I feel like I have no business taking time off right now. I already have one hand tied behind my back with my associate out on family leave. On top of that, I have a slew of important meetings the second I get back. Putting up an “out of office” reply isn’t really in the cards. But let’s be real here, my technology addiction alone wound’t allow that to happen. I’d have a conniption knowing a client request wasn’t promptly addressed within 24-hours. I can’t help but to think, is my reluctance to travel really just an excuse to keep working? If it is, why am I compelled to do this?
Sometime during college, I learned that despite my dad’s ability to plan a mean vacay, he didn’t really believe in taking them and he certainly didn’t believe in taking time off unless he absolutely had too. For example, anytime I brought up the topic of a spring or summer break with my friends, he made it seem like vacations were for the weak and lazy. At the time. I didn’t get why he was like this, but I sure get it today. He was working as hard as he was back when I was a kid, but with me being “grown up” and all, there was less of an obligation to take the kids somewhere. I guess some of that rubbed off on me.
In looking back on those summer road trips, it all makes perfect sense how and why they happened. I was too young and busy having fun to realize it, but my dad found a way to wrap both work and family obligations into a vacation he had to take. This allowed him to satisfy everyone while keeping engaged professionally. With all that I have going on, I personally understand the efficiencies (and genius) of this move. In fact, my wife and I have implemented it on more than a few occasions ourselves. Our lives our busy, so we do what we can to get away.
Practicalities aside, I worry I might be slow adopting my father’s attitude when it comes to taking time off, especially when my kid get older. However, unlike my father, I don’t think vacations are for the week or lazy. In fact, I believe they are a necessary component to achieving balancing in one’s work and life. Besides, I love traveling and I honestly can’t wait to explore the world with my family. I’d have regrets if I became so caught up in my business that I couldn’t take a moment to actually be in the moment. So, I tell myself I won’t allow that to happen.
The real question then becomes, “Will I be different or will history repeat itself?” Well, if this post is any indication of things to come, I am off to a bad start. Clearly, I have much to work on. Now, you will have to excuse me, I have a vacation to get back to.
Note: I love my dad. He’s responsible for so much good in my life (not to mention a career in personal finance) and I would hate for anyone to think otherwise. I know he had a blast with us, even if he couldn’t stop thinking about his business. For me, this is one of those “life lesson” moments where I can take my own experiences and shape them into something different for me and my family. I know how lucky I am to have that opportunity.